Living Totem Pole

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Life looms easily,

We are so small within it.

I know as solidly as I can know anything

That everything is temporary

And that can be enough sometimes

To wait out the looming,

To work through it,

To find the next beautiful space.

Other times there is just so much all at once

That despite all my Knowing,

My Feeling is more than my Knowing

And I become a scared rabbit

Wanting only for a small, warm space

To hold me in silence and solitude

Until whatever-it-is has passed.

As I get older I learn to embrace pain and fear,

To let them move through me and find their way out again

Which doesn’t make it easy,

But I am always strong enough to find a smile within myself,

Understanding that there is more,

Always more,

Than this.

And so this time,

When the great So Much found me,

the Too Much,

the Can You Handle the Looming of Much,

I summoned up my protectors,

My strong animal friends,

And I drew myself safe within the belly of a bear,

Deep inside a creature of strength.

Not consumed,

But being recreated.

Safe in a womb, being nurtured and becoming More.

I draw on the strength of all these animals who nurture me and protect me,

And while I feel more powerful for calling them to me,

They are not coming to me

From away in the woods;

They together comprise who I am,

And, far from being in the belly of a bear,

It is they,

In fact,

Who are in

Me.

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